Proverbs 31:10-12 - Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.
The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.
She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.
This last verse is one which I think that most of us girls never really think about: "...All the days of her life." This means the days of our married life; it means the days of our courtship; and it means the days before we ever meet Prince Charming! Yes, we can be doing our husband good even before we meet him! In fact, our preparation prior to marriage is a main determining factor in whether or not we will be good wives ... whether or not we will "do our husband good" during our married lives.
What are some ways that we can "do our husband good" even before Prince Charming comes sailing (or galloping) into our lives?
1. Give our hearts to our fathers for safekeeping.
God has given our fathers to us as our authority. It is our fathers' responsibility to protect us and guide us; it is our duty to honor our fathers and trust them implicitly. We should not be seeking the companionship and protection of other young men, but we should be content and secure in our father's safekeeping. One day, Lord willing, our father will give us away to another young man. Until that time, we belong to him. Giving our hearts to our fathers is the surest safeguard for keeping our hearts pure for our future husbands.
2. Keep ourselves pure not only physically, but emotionally as well.
The question is not "How far can I go?" but "How pure can I be?" Today, with the "Christian Dating" route, the whole emphasis is placed on physical purity. However, we are not just empty shells of skin and bones. We have souls, minds, and emotions inside! When we get married, we are not just giving our husbands our bodies; we are giving them ourselves, our emotions and heart included. We must keep our emotions pure! The modern dating game centers around emotions. It gives emotional thrills and takes young people on exciting emotional roller coasters. But what is being lost during that time? Every time a girl "falls in love" - becomes emotionally involved - with yet another young man, she is giving him a little piece of her heart. She is giving away something very valuable, something that should one day belong solely to her husband. We must purpose to keep ourselves emotionally pure, avoiding emotionally-defrauding relationships.
3. Cultivate a submissive spirit. (Ephesians 5:22, Colossians 3:18)
"Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord." We cannot live independent, self-centered, autonomous lives before our marriage, and then expect ourselves to suddenly be transformed into godly, submissive angels on our wedding day! We must cultivate the character quality of submission all of our lives. Before we are married, we must, with the Lord's help, learn to submit our wills to our authorities. We must be eager and delighted to do the will of our earthly father as well as our heavenly Father. Life isn't about us; it is about bringing glory to God through following our great, God-given calling!
4. Learn to be a helpmeet to our fathers. (Genesis 2:18, Proverbs 31:23)
Genesis 2:18 says, "And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him." This is what we were created for. We have the power to make our husband a success or a failure. But, again, we cannot just jump right in to marriage fit to take on this task. The goal of our single years should be to be an effective helpmeet to our fathers.
5. Develop practical home-making skills. (Proverbs 31:13-15, 18-19, 21-22, 27)
Man does not live by bread alone. However, some bread is necessary. Poorly-cooked food and a messy house are not conducive to a happy, healthy marriage! Proverbs 31, which extols the virtuous woman, places a high value on home-making skills. It describes an efficient seamstress and industrious cook. While cultivating good character qualities, we must not forget that physical needs must be met as well!
6. Enjoy a healthy relationship with God.
None of the previous five points can effectively be accomplished without God's grace and guidance in our lives. Since the fall, man has been an inherently selfish creature, quick to put self first and slow to prefer others. Each of the five preceding points requires us to deny ourselves and work for something beyond ourselves. Only with the Lord's help can this be achieved. It is imperative that we spend time daily in His Word and come to Him daily in prayer.
In these early days of our lives, we must remember that what we do now determines who we will be in the future. As single young women, let us all - myself especially - examine ourselves and learn whether or not we are "doing our husband good" during this season of our lives.